“Be and look prepared. Be a man on integrity. Never break your word. Don’t have two sets of standards. Stand up for yourself. Show them what you can do on and off the court” – Red Auerbach
Humans share an innate drive to connect with others.
Because of the consequences of being rejected, our brains and behavior adapted to avoid disapproval from others.
Sports psychology for basketball research has shown that social rejection activates many of the same brain regions involved in physical pain, which helps explains why some athletes seek approval from others.
The Impact of Constant Approval Seeking
There are several pitfalls of approval-seeking mind-set.
Always seeking approval can seriously derail your basketball success in the long run.
When you try to please everyone, you set yourself up for nonstop perfection that can lead to performance anxiety and mental game stress.
The risk is higher when this overwhelms the way you think of yourself, when you start to second guess yourself, and when you begin to always look outwards for signs of whether you are ‘doing the right thing’ or whether you’re ‘good enough.’
Negative self-thoughts can begin to creep in and start affecting your basketball confidence.
Eventually, all of these results in a sense that you need to train harder, do more to keep up, be more to prove yourself, robbing you of the joy in playing ball and resulting in burn out.
What Drives Your Approval-Seeking Mind-set
Sports psychologist for basketball has pointed out two reasons that work behind this mind-set.
The first is the fear of failure. Fear of failure is often rooted in the need to seek approval from others.
You fear if you fail, other people won’t like you. This is the single major obstacle to success in basketball of athletes. Then when the fear of failure is taken to its extreme, chances are you become pre-occupied with not making mistakes in whatever we do.
The second is the fear of rejection. This fear hinders performance and inhibits expression.
Athletes begin to succumb to this fear type at a young age, and primarily when they need love and support from friends and family. This behavior can easily follow through as you get older and begin to play ball.
It’s natural for us to seek approval from others as it gives us a feeling of security, but if you find this need is negatively affecting how you think and behave, it’s time for a change.
Here are some basketball psychology strategies you can follow:
1. It starts with you and the question to yourself, “Am I one of these athletes who have always been an approval seeker”?
2. “Where on the pendulum do I sit, and am I okay with that”?
3. You then need to ask, what is this costing me? Professionally, personally, physically, psychologically, or financially?
4. “What does my intuition say in how I react or respond to this situation?”
5. Ask yourself – “what next” or “what can I change, or do I even want to?”
6. “Now that I can identify this in me, how do I now manage this mind-set?”
7. Accept the situation and outcome of your decision and what impact you have on yourself. This is self-responsibility.
You must take charge of your thoughts instead of remaining chained by our ego’s need for support and protection.
Believe that you are worthy and that you are capable of doing what you want to do.
You have what it takes to reach the levels that you dream of and desire. Start working on your mental skills today. There is no better time than right now!
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